A game of two halves

OK so I am walking like I might have had an "accident" but I can assure you I haven't. It might be to do with the weight of my medal which I have proudly paraded around the office "it looks like a Jim'll fix it badge"! And absolutely nothing to do with getting 26.2 miles under my belt!

48 hours of classic Whetton-Scobey adventure has just passed through our world and it looks something like this:

Having been up far too late Friday night due to the amazing quiz night, we should have enjoyed a lovely long sleep but alas we both were experiencing pre marathon butterflies and Mark went to make tea at some obscenely early hour. 3 hours later we were up and en route to the train station and the beginnings of my marathon journey. But I had a really niggly feeling... I didn't think it was butterflies but I checked and checked my bag in case I had forgotten something important... sports bra check, trainers check, charity vest check, application confirmation check, photographic ID....? photographic ID....? STOP THE CAR! Yep I had left drivers license at home having decided in my last minute wisdom that I didn't need my full purse, but just some cash and a card instead.

1 hour later we had retraced our steps, collected missing drivers license (no photo ID, no race pack, no running) and were nearing the station when... "ERRRR mummy Thea has been sick!"

Of course she has. Of course she decided that today, of all days, was the day to see what happened if you ate raisins (well I think there were raisins) found under the sheepskin car seat cover ... who knows how old there were but the resulting explosion suggests too long. So with sick on my jumper and hands, and no wipes it was an emergency detour to the local shop to try and "clean this mess up!" whilst Tom continued to recount how "it came out just like a water pistol!" Delightful!

30 mins later were back on the road and running more than an hour and a half late. Luckily the rest of the day went swimmingly and I managed to pick up my runner pack from the Excel centre with no further delays.

Spending the night in Greenwich at the lovely Anke and Migs house with Jill and Si and darling Mia, afforded me a lie in and some great gossip to take my mind off the run. Both Anke and Simon had run marathons and were full of tips whilst Mig and Jill just necked their wine laughing at the crazy runners! And I can report that despite the temptation I remainded tee total... which in itself deserves £4000 in sponsorship. Roll on 5am and sleep was not an option... my butterflies were resembling a herd of elephants and I attempted a bowl of porridge which didn't sit too well! Come 7.30 it was time to "transform from Goddess to Athlete" to which Jill, one of my oldest and loveliest friends fell about laughing unable to decide which was the funnier description! Cheeky!

And then it was time to leave "home" and meet my fellow marathonites. I was primed and ready; miles inked in my forearm to keep me focussed; 4.5 lucozade, 6 cutty sark, 6/7 Jill and Si, 8/9 Meg, Si and Tom..... little tricks to help me break the massive challenge into "bite sized chunks".

So whilst waiting for the starting line up I decided I ought to nip to the loo and had the "enjoyable" experience of trying the new P-mate concept; a urinal for women with disposable willy funnels! Boys all I can say is I now understand dribble on the loo seat! It was hilarious walking into the "lady urinal" area (basically a trough in the middle of a field with wind breaks erected to protect diginity) seeing lots of pert ladies bottoms, running trousers around their legs, shaking with laughter!

Before long (and some serious alco wash later) we were lining up in our pens ready for the starter gun and partaking in a minute silence in respect of Boston. 37,000 people pumped with adrenalin and you could hear the birds cheeping in the trees. Total emotion-fest... blubbering wreck incident #1. Then the starter gun went and.... we all stood still. It actually took me 16 minutes to cross the start line and I was shaking with adrenalin not quite believing I was about to run 26.2 miles in the London Marathon. Me who had never run more than 5km until November last year and who had always claimed "I am not a runner!".

Mile 1 -3 passed in the blink of an eye, jelly beans at every mile seemed to come around before I had even finished the previous one it seemed. As we came out of Greenwich I looked up the hill to the right and saw a mass of other runners coming from the green and blue starts - it was an amazing sight and cue for blubbering wreck #2.

Cutty Sark was a sight (note to self must visit it sometime) and then out of nowhere Jill, Si and Mia were upon me. I nearly missed them and so glad they were almost hoarse trying to get my attention. I would have been gutted to have missed them, especially after their amazing hospitality.

Mile 9 saw cheerleaders number 2 (Meg, Si and 3 week old baby Tom) and this was the cause of blubbering wreck #3. Having not met the delightful Tom before I was overwhelmed that they had made the mass treck acoss London for lil ole me AND bought be bananas and Percy Pigs! Amazing! I can honestly say I felt fresh as a daisy and couldn't believe 9 miles had gone. It felt like I had been running for 1 mile and I was so pleased that my fitness was still there and that the swimming replacement for running had worked and saved my knees. I was on course for a 4.45 marathon time which was my dream!

1.5 miles later I saw my lovely boys and Clare but at this point my knee was beginning to niggle. Not quite limping but the realisation that it was going to "pop" sooner rather than later was a sickening feeling. By the time I reached London Bridge I was in real pain, attempting pain diversion by forcing my nails into my hands which would work for half a minute or so before I was forced to return to limping. I was gutted; not even half way into the race and London Bridge being such a highpoint of the race and I was in a bad way.

By mile 13 I was walking more than I was running and could see runners coming back from the City on the other side of the road. They were 7 miles in front and still happy and shiny and here I was limping, frowning and sad. My resolve was disolving.

I next saw mum and dad which must have been mile 15ish and mum gave me hug which gave me the lift I needed but the pain was excruiating. I couldn't believe that despite all the training, despite not being tired or lacking energy, being DESPERATE to run, I couldn't because of my knees. I then made the fatal error of working out my finish time if I had to limp the rest of the way and it was obscene. They would be clearing up around me and this was such a humiliating thought. My training deserved so  much more!

Mile 18 saw big blub out incident #4. I just cried in Marks arms as the pain was so bad.  It was 4.15 so beating 5 hours was now impossible and I had lost all focus. I had even stopped taking my mile marker jelly beans as I couldn't see the point. However some whispered words of support and love, a cuddle from Tom, painkillers and a jelly baby later and I was off again trying to hold it together until "Go Helen you can do it!" from some lovely random supporter. It just hit me like an emotionally train and the tears just fell and fell. And if it weren't for another injured runner, Sarah, I might well have lost my way, but she picked me up emotionally and we walked together for 2 miles chatting about her story and mine (and seeing the lovely Kate on the way). I felt my resolve build and my confidence come back as the pain subsided and by mile 20 I decided it was a case of bust or broke. With  4.45 on the clock I realised I might just, with a fair wind, be able to beat 5.30 (the last sweepstake slot). I became obsessed that there would be a revolt if I was longer than 5.30. That it would been seen as "unfair" that no later times had been offered. That it was a fix; a phone scandal if you will! I was on a mission (all be it an unfounded one!): I HAD to beat 5.30 so it was a case of "run forest run!"

It was amazing to be running. That was what I came for and trained for and had the energy for. In fact I had so much pent up energy and emotion that I was Lewis Hamilton overtaking the broken runners, patting them on the back giving them support and encouragement and whipping the crowds up; yes I was THAT annoying runner. I felt invincible and was so enjoying being alert enough mentally and physically to be able to enjoy the final 6.2 miles which, in my view, were always going to be the best parts. Down the Embankment, past London Eye, towards Houses of Parliament with crowds and crowds lining both sides of the road. The road was much wider than in many previous parts and I had room to move. This was my marathon moment.

Mile 25.5 and I saw my final supporters Matt and Chloe and apparently "You looked so full of energy" and to be honest I felt it. Rounding the corner with 800 meters to go I waved and Buck Palace and fought emotional melt down #5. I could hardly breath with the enormity of it all. I was crying in my throat; just the noise but no tears were coming. I honestly think I was emotionally drained and didn't know what to do but run and I just hope that there is one picture of that final strip where my face is not contorted too badly!

Crossing the finish line was unbelievable. I couldn't comprehend the complete change of events in the previous 45 minutes. That I had run my fastest miles at the end - unheard of! I had done it and with an ok-ish time. I thought I would be disappointed but I am not. I am frustrated that my training deserved a better time but you can't odds injury and luckily my sponsorship wasn't time dependent so the big picture is the same. I raised a huge amount (£4K when all added I think) for some great causes.... and the ballot opens monday for 2014 London Marathon so there is always next year....!

Life is like a butterfly...

and so is my tummy! The anticipation, months of training and carb loading is nearly over. In just over 26 hours I will be shivering my little socks of in Greenwich with 52,000 other runners, nerves flying and legs like lead no doubt. This has come around way too quickly - anyone with a loathing for winter I recommend training for the London marathon as for me the months have flown by.

So it is too late to do any more - no more training, no more fartleks just a wander to the Excel centre to collect my runners pack, a pasta fest tonight and some good (although unlikely) quality sleep.

But I am buoyed. The last few weeks of "donation hunting" has been tough - asking people for money can at times be a little uncomfortable but everyone has been so kind and generous. At the beginning of the week I was £400 short of my target figure of £2620 and was not sure I would make it. My "bankers" had already coughed up (dearest friends and relatives) and so I was reliant on goodwill from my wider circle. Luckily my wider circle more than delivered with donations coming from far corners of my world. My little Sussex campaigners (ma and pops) were superstars and sent glowingly proud emails to all and sundry with instructions to support their little girl. And by Thursday morning the figure was met... and then something astounding happened (pay day?)... it just kept growing and growing and growing to the point of its current Virgin Money Giving total of £2852. Gobsmacked! This will certainly fuel me around the course knowing every mile is another £100. So tomorrow is a thank you to all you generous donators. I can honestly say that had such a significant amount not be riding on tomorrow I might be opting for a lazy lie in, sunday roast and watching the race from the sofa.

I also have to give you an update to the quiz night last night. Little Coxwell came good in a way only it knows how to do. When the village backs something it does it whole heartedly with a big smacker, a massive hug and a huge amount of laughter! The pub was heaving - 11 tables in total - and we had joint winners "Drakes and Hens" and " Beef or Chicken"... you gotta love the team names! More importantly we raised in excess of £390 (which is on top of the total above) and everyone really enjoyed MC Scobes! My little super star though was Tom. My 7 year old managed to sell a phenomenal amount of raffle tickets and sweep stake time slots (guess mummy's marathon time). Many sneakily quizzed him on my previous training times, condition, terrain preference (it seems I am not the only one who has identified my thoroughbred qualities). However I think he might have (unintentionally) misled many as I overheard "mummy is going to beat Mo Farah". OK I might have sown that seed earlier this week; I AM competing in a race where Mo is also a competitor and I WILL finish (unlike him who is being marshalled out at 13.1) so TECHNICALLY I will beat Mo Farah! But if you were misguided last night all I can say is "it all goes to charity!"

And so this is my last blog before I get my new bling. Don't forget, you can track me as I make their way around the 26.2 miles course via the Virgin London Marathon website from 7am tomorrow all you need is my race number (52704).

If you are watching from the comforts of your sofa one final request.... do it in stye; Pjs and a cuppa tea (pre 11), Sherry and Sunday casual wear (11am - 12.30), G&T and Sunday best 12.30 onwards!

Wish me well my friends. Tomorrow I become an Athlete!

What a difference a day makes!

Ok ok so firstly I owe you all a big apology for my defeatist attitude yesterday. I blame it on the onset of a cold - the germs were busy waging a war on my logic and for a brief period they won the battle. But the war continues and logic and I are back in the driving seat so bring on 26.2 miles and more!

So what has turned me around? Deep visualisation? Talking to experts? Meditation? Hypnosis? Nope something far more special and unique; the amazing out pourings from the least expected corners of my little world.

Naturally number one supporter was this little girls daddy (and mummy)! Pops was straight on the phone before the ink was dry on the blog. He was trying hard to lift his would be marathonite but we both knew it was fruitless - after 37 years he knows better than anyone how hard I am on myself and he finished our brief chat with a firm "we'll be there on Sunday and so will you". Despite my down and out demeanour I was delighted he called!

Next anonymous (are you the same anonyomous who suggested I, gasp, shave the whole of my leg rather than stopping mid calf?) responded with a reference to a much earlier posting so obviously a regular to this blog.

"Keep calm and carry on. It's a long way to Tipperary, pack up your troubles in your old kit bag and SMILE. SmILE, SMILE. Your British!!! "

Thank you - the thought that someone has been following me was such a delight; my very own pet stalker - at last I have something in common with Cameron Diaz!

Motivation #3 came from someone I had no idea was even aware or interested in my crazy pledge. I have known this person since we were babies - in fact whenever mum sees a baby you can pretty much guarantee her next words will be:

"Ah the best looking baby I have ever laid eyes on was David Ashdown. He was beauuuuutiful!"

Anyway David and I were buddies from playgroup through to sixth form and have recently been reunited via the power of Facebook. Despite an absence of friendship of more than 20 years, David gave me the honest kick up the bum I needed! His full comment can be seen on the previous blog but it was both touching and moving and honest. I am certain that he is a lovely straight talking dad, very much like my own (who also used to be his scout leader!)

And then just as I was heading off to bedfordshire mum pinged me to make sure I had read the lovely comments on my blog - it was like being a little girl again and being tucked up in bed with a kiss on the forehead. Thanks mum!

And then this morning the good stuff kept coming. A wonderful email from the lovely Georgia who had spent last weekend in Paris watching her brother run the Paris marathon. It was a lovely long email promising sponsorship but more importantly sharing what an amazing atmosphere there had been in Paris and how uplifting it was

"it made me feel like I wanted to run it!"

I am not sure she had seen my bleak blog - I think this was a genuine coincidence but her final paragraph started

"I just wanted to let you know this in case this helps!!! I have seen the highs and lows of training... he had had two hours sleep the night before from nerves... ended up smashing it...atmosphere was so positive and exciting it gave him a real adrenaline rush... hope it is the same for you! I know how hard you've worked and I am so impressed, and excited for you!... You'll nail it, I'm sure of it!"

Thanks Georgia... your words meant so much and got my heart racing in excitement at the prospect of the 4/5/6 hours of adenalin I am going to experience on Sunday.

At this point the sun started to break through my darkness and I checked my sponsorship page... another £50 from people I am amazed are aware or even interested enough to support me. Old family friends from the USA, another old school friend (who I haven't seen for way too many years), an old friend of my fundraising guru who I have never met but who has promised to donate £10 per month. What amazing stuff guys! Thank you so so much for showing me that the sunshine in my life is not about being the best. It isn't about ignoring those in a dark place. It isn't about riches. It is about people and kindness and support and honesty and doing something for nothing. Thank you for putting me back in my place and back on the 26.2 mile yellow brick road towards The Mall.

Not sure these are ideal running shoes!

Down and out?

The past 4 months my life (our life) has been focussed on training for The London Marathon. Through more snow and ice than I would have liked - apprently this is the worst training season on record - and now, having aclimatised to the severe cold, we are set of an unexpected heatwave hitting London next Sunday. Yep that's my luck for you!

So not only am I going to be battling conditions 20+ degrees higher than the majority of my training, I am also not fighting fit. For those of you that have been following my progress, training was going amazingly well until 3rd March where I sustained a knee injury at the Bath Half and since then my training has fallen by the wayside. I have managed approx 30 miles (instead of 150) and am now the owner of a bright yellow swimming hat as I have taken my training to the water, BUT I am not nearly as fit or prepared as I was. Mentally I am broken. The marathon has me beaten already and I feel ill prepared. Everyone says I have done more than enough training - a couple of 17 milers and 3 x 15 milers - but would anyone really say anything different? Either way I am mentally unfit - I can no longer visualise myself as a marathon runner (an expert top tip), I don't see myself as "fit" (as in fitness rather than phwoar - not sure I ever had that!), I am scared of not knowing how the knees will hold up and I feel the months of hard training has been pointless.Sponsorship, the thing that  has been keeping me determined and reminds me of why I am doing this, is naturally slowing down - I have pretty my exhausted all my friends and families pockets - and if it weren't for the £2000+ already raised I would seriously be considering staying in bed next Sunday night.

In fact things are so bad I am cake loading rather than carb loading... I have never done anything like this before and was feeling so proud of my improvement and focus, but my injuries have stolen my pride, ruined my efforts and irradicated any resulting positive attitude. I am at the point of suggesting my "supporters" stay at home as I don't feel like I deserve the support.

So any advice on how to turn this around will be most welcome... otherwise I will attempt a more upbeat post later in the week.

Good vibrations

After 5 weeks of dubious knee-age and severley reduced training, I have, today, managed a 9 mile run - the most have achieved in more 3 and a half weeks. Having spent a small fortune in recent weeks on lotions and potions, physio and knee support I might be on to something with my new strap on!

It appears my IT Band (no idea what this is) was "stressed". Now my normal remedy for stress is a large gin and tonic but due to my rather sizeable thighs I decided that soaking my limbs in the finest from Bombay would be a waste, and not being a particularly good siphonist (waste not want not) I decided to administer gin in the normal way (slice of lime, tonic and loads of ice) and take professional advice on reducing IT Band stress.

And the remedy is rather convoluted expensive. I now have a foam (in my opinion a trade description as it is as hard as nails) roller that I lie on sideways and roll my body from my hip to my knee (sounds like a good lyric for a an 80s pop icon see here). I also have some hip strengthening exercises (all I need now is a bus pass to fully complete my aging persona) called the crab!

And finally I am the proud owner of an ITB strap on with "Medical Grade Silicone Insert for Vibration Dampening". Check it out!

This is not my knee - mine is far hairier!

So I strapped this on and gave it a try. My trainer came with me today, pedalling slowly behind me checking my "form" (mile 2 he asked me if I was trying new performance undies - more on this later - which led me to believe his focus was very much on the form of my gluts - cheap thrills!). By mile 4 my left knee was feeling very un-loved and it too wanted a silicon vibration dampening strap on so I swapped it over. MAGIC. Straight away my left knee was in heaven and the pain practically disappeared... by mile 6 my right knee was begging wantonly for some vibration dampening. So what is a girl to do when her body is crying out for more vibration dampening that she has available. Buy another strap on! And so I am now the proud owner of not one but two Medical Grade Silicone Insert for Vibration Dampening strap ons, and am £40 worse off! Let's hope my knees enjoy their dirty weekend and remain in knee heaven all around London in two and a half weeks time!

So with knees sorted (ish) I am now panicking about other elements of my attire. New running tights need ordering but which size (8-10 or 12-14... I want a 10 - 12 grr) and which colour (one which matches my London Breast Cancer Care top or one which matches my normal running gear?) I am also on a mission to find the "best" running knickers. I have set up a spreadsheet where I can mark them out ten for comfort, support and how often I need to perform the knicker extraction manoeuvre....! What a lady!

One other lesson learnt today is to not run after a burger. I had real golden arch belly so it appears my holiday treat for the kids might have back fired on me. Knew I should have gone for the salad, at least I burnt the calories off so the guilt is removed.

So with that all underway all that is left to do is get some more miles under my belt, book more physio massages and begin to panic about 21st. Not long now!